Month: July 2018 (page 2 of 4)

Angel Barber

Cancer 27° (July 19)

 

We didn’t get the beach today. I did manage to get a haircut from my ancient barber, Raphael, who told me the texture of my hair had changed. He recommended buying a huge tube of Nexxus from Amazon because it is only $25. His hours are 7:30 to 11:00 only four days a week. He starts his day at 7AM but sometimes clients are there at 6:30 waiting for him because they’d rather wait that half hour than three hours later in the morning; the place gets packed, mainly with elderly men, and Raphael takes his time.

I keep rejigging my schedule (which I shall continue to do for several days no doubt) the law of diminishing returns being levied on me, as I realize my idealistic notion of fitting in all the work I need to do before I leave will happen. It won’t. And so I’ll be taking it with me, which might be fine, lest I get too far behind (which I shall!). What I have managed to do is to get the website into some kind of shape. And to get all our graphics under way. I think I am in decent shape, not just with the festival, but with all my works; but I really won’t know until after this trip.

Traveling with work can go either way. You might just drag it with you and spend the whole time torn between the jobs you need doing and the beckoning holiday doings or the off-site-ness of the journey can provide some proper perspective for plowing through and hitting your marks in such a ways as can’t for the time being happen at home base. We hit walls when we look at the same four of them, day in and day out, trying to make professional magic—stepping away for a few weeks might just be the tonic the proverbial doctor ordered, even if you don’t actually do the work at hand (and so long as you make your peace with not doing so). But I have a good feeling this time out. Erin Markey is totes persona non grata and this juncture and another performer is now exhibiting signs of not following through. Given the former situation I have a short fuse with anyone making those kinds of waves; I think I might be on the defensive. Anyway I must have slapped her down enough that the grumblings stopped. And then of course, because I’m me, I felt bad. But I would have felt worse if I had to replace someone so there.

 

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree of the Sabian Symbol may be higher than the one listed here  as the symbols culminate in the next degree. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 days. 

 

Typos happen—I don’t have time or an intern to edit.*
Copyright 2018 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2018 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Touch Up

Cancer 26° (July 18)

Got up super early today and managed to get done a lot of busy work and packing for the trip. And that was the only thing I wrote on this day….it is now nearly a week later; however I’m not compelled to catch up in the traditional sense. I have to make the switch, really, now, to stop the banal cranking out of daily entries. It now must become more than that. That said, en route to re-working some past ideas, which will be the main thrust for awhile, I should like to get a few things off my chest.

The last few days on the beach were complete bliss; and it is weird to think how much we will miss our daily constitutionals. However I would have had no idea how freaking beautiful the trip to Alaska would be. And I shall regal you with accounts of the trip as the days unfold. On this day in question I am feeling good, expansive, like I’m getting much work done, especially on the festival, and that I really am in a relatively good place with balancing work and life.

I am checking many things off the to-do list and that sometimes can be rewarding on a meager level. Still there is no substitute for leaving for a long trip with having all your ducks in a row; so that is what I am doing. Getting a little bit of a tan and some exercise is actually part of that plan. Funny how you start to feel so well, and even a little smug before a trip, and you might plan to be “more abstemious this time”, all the while, in th eback of your head, though, you know with certainty you’re going to blow your diet and teetotaling ways the second you hit your holiday. In my case it will prove to have happened sooner than expected.

I did a bit of touch up paint, mainly in case landlord Jim were to do a walk through the house. The paint job I did do a few weeks ago was really cursory and it is spotty (or rather brush strokey) at best, which I had no time to fix—the least I could do was to straighten some of the lines where wall met ceiling so that, at a glance, it wouldn’t be so glaring a crap job (which it is).

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree of the Sabian Symbol may be higher than the one listed here  as the symbols culminate in the next degree. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 days. 

 

Typos happen—I don’t have time or an intern to edit.*
Copyright 2018 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2018 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Write Fast

Cancer 25° (July 17)

 

I’m going to focus on the positive. I’m going to clean slate myself and stop living in fear. I have plenty of time and I have done all the heavy lifting already. Everything else now can just be icing. And downtime, even a wee trip down the rabbit hole, is a necessary part of the process. I actually feel renewed and thus ready to keep up the good fight. I must find a way to activate S+C against what is happening politically. I must find a way to give counsel to people, more widely, as I do for our individual clients. I feel it must now be a calling and I have to get that mechanism moving. I ask for guidance on this score.

Next year will be the crystal anniversary of Sextrology and I’m thinking up a bunch of fun ways to promote what will definitely be a new ebook edition, and hopefully a new print one; it requires getting a wee bit more respect from that powers that be at HarperCollins. They’re owned by Murdoch that fascist reptile so, really, if they don’t pony up, they can go fuck themselves. It dawned on me today how many people I know who are powered by phony fucking money. I have been so naive whe friends have mine have had houses bought for them, school tuitions paid for them—and I’ve seen them elated and celebratory. How to remain friends with people you know are succored by what would be blood money. To be honest, if I think it through I’m not really surprised. Some of my best friends for decades I fear might really be quite, how do you say, elitist (in the true sense not in the insdide-out GOP-spin sense). Of course they are the same people who give to Christian charities, which, unbeknownst to them, are likely human trafficking outfits. You think I’m kidding and I’m not. I need to get more involved in Lumos and other organizations.

This week is not turning out to be what I expected and I keep rejigging my daily planner. But you know what—fuck it. Time has to work for me not the other way around. I will get through everything and all will be done, so why stress. Why stress anything really. It’s all made up. The important things now I find are exercise and eating right. That’s the simple first stepness of the Zodiac as well, it starts with Aries which rules the first house of, among other things, the physical body. The physical body, according to the Zodiac is spirt made manifest. Anyway, I’m not going to go on about astrology right now; I’m more interested in remaining terrestrial, here, today.

I’m going to miss our daily walks here these next three weeks. Wow that is a lot of missed walks. I won’t be getting much exercise on the yacht I can tell you. I suppose I shall have to learn how to walk on a treadmill—perish the thought. I miss the sand and sea and seals and so forth.

 

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree of the Sabian Symbol may be higher than the one listed here  as the symbols culminate in the next degree. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 days. 

 

Typos happen—I don’t have time or an intern to edit.*
Copyright 2018 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2018 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Trickling

Cancer 24° (July 16)

 

It just takes a moment for things to go completely off. I was doing fine enough. But one false move and then everything goes kaput. I have to learn my lesson this time. I can’t keep making the same mistake over and over. It’s not a good look, and it puts me in deeper danger than I can rationalize. When I’m not in the correct state of mind I am simply too uninhibited to know what’s what. I feel for me I really do. There is a huge part of me that is, for lack of a better word, missing. And so I take scraps, but I realize that I might really be living out some trauma, or retraumatizing myself, to use modern vernacular.

I need to treat this vacation as a vacation. I think I need to really rest and recuperate and let myself be taken care of a little. Maybe something has finally switched in me for the better where I realize that I know longer process the same input as I did in the past. I am beginning to know what is detritus and not to repeat patterns on the them of that definition of insanity. I am not going to make things better this way. I have to keep my head screwed on straight if I’m to navigate my personal and professional life and this increasingly crazy world. Otherwise the proverbial they win. They are trying to wear us down. And we can’t let them.

All this while we watch our illegitimate president suck Putin’s cock on international TV.

I won’t get into it. I can’t get into it. Our leaders now have to step up and prove that we are stronger than this one man. Meanwhile, I have my own goals to achieve, my own battles to fight, only I’m not fighting. I am tired of speaking about myself and giving a daily account. Something has switched in me and I need to speak on more metaphorical and metaphysical a level. I must begin to achieve what I need to achieve and to sleep when I’m tired. I cannot keep coming up against the same obstacles—it’s not doing anybody any good. Especially me. I’m the one who truly suffers and I’m kind of sick of it.

And so I go to the beach and I walk three miles in sinking sand. I eat healthfully and sleep nine hours. I sit back at my computer and resolve to do better. I make my plans for the future with more than hope, but resolve The general atmosphere these past two years has trickled down, even to members of our so-called community. I see an uptick in selfish, venal, mercenary, self-aggrandizing behavior across the board to which most people have not been immune. There is the overt and there is the insidious. The result of feeling universally persecuted unfortunately results in fearful dog-eat-dogging. You are only a victim if you choose to be; and if you do, you are likely going to victimize others in the process. I choose kindness, increased compassion, community and, most of all, I choose forgiveness and Love.

 

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree of the Sabian Symbol may be higher than the one listed here  as the symbols culminate in the next degree. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 days. 

 

Typos happen—I don’t have time or an intern to edit.*
Copyright 2018 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2018 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Barns

Cancer 23° (July 15)

 

You have to include everything—you can’t be so black and white. You are not good nor are you evil if you indulge in certain behaviors. Whether or not they are good or not for you, they needn’t have resonance beyond the scope of the action itself. It is its own thing. It doesn’t mean anything more about you. It surely isn’t a sign you’re spinning down in any way. Especially when coincidence or synchronicity brings such things to you. You must accept them. They have no moral assignation.

You don’t have parents looking over your shoulder; and you’re not in trouble. And though it is comforting that friends might play that knowing, authoritative part from time to time, you have an off-switch. You understand how to monitor yourself. Like now: You can ritualize your experience, not only including it but empowering it to empower you, instead of rationalizing it, embarrassed by expressions of your true nature. You can do this. It is all a choice. All choices are a choice. Imagine guilt not playing a part.

I will read the Bhagavad Gita (again?) while on this trip and read nothing else. It will mark the beginning of new spiritual sustenance. I have often read great books on boats. This is the essential book and I will not not read it. Alaska should be something of a spiritual journey. It should absolutely not be anything that resembles a debauch, by any stretch of the imagination. I am looking forward to seeing my friend Florian most of all (to be honest).

I have not had the best taste in friends over the years. It really is an area where I am really terrible. I didn’t much enjoy the weekend having all my high school friends to visit, I must be honest. It was way too full on. People are so selfish and narciissistic. I don’t think I am, but maybe people say that about me. Who knows.

 

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree of the Sabian Symbol may be higher than the one listed here  as the symbols culminate in the next degree. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 days.

 

Typos happen—I don’t have time or an intern to edit.*
Copyright 2018 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2018 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Storm It

Cancer 22° (July 14)

Ah Bastille Day. I have memories of almost winning a boule tournament one Bastille Day, playing in partnership with chef Alan Harding against dozens of teams from all the top French restaurants in New York. If I remember correctly we came in third or fourth.

I am having terrible writer’s block in attempting to meet some important project deadlines. I think it’s because there are so many different things going on at once; I always think I can stick to set “units of time” but, alas, I never have. Still everything gets done; and I must remember what I told myself yesterday. Meanwhile I am front-loading health and exercise. The day has been starting with low tide so it’s up and out to the beach for the next few days, which really helps keep my head on straight.

This time next week I’ll be setting off to Boston for the weekend and meeting with the Dean of the MFA. I look forward to just being able to focus on all things Glow-y for awhile and to get cracking on the fundraising which is seriously lacking this year. Provincetown has never felt more changed, filled with day trippers while Ryan Murphy and his ilk continue to buy up houses they don’t live in. It’s become such a status symbol for rich gays. But the arts outlook is becoming rather dim in the process.

Ooh, I haven’t in so long a time felt such a spirit of excitement and élan as I am currently experiencing. Even in the mindst of the mountain of work I’m facing, somehow it all seems manageable, due to how much effort I’ve already put in. I’m quite proud of myself and my accomplishments thus far this year, and I can say so here, publically, because it’s only you and me reading this. Ha! And who cares. I had an artist bag out on me, or rather never even have the courtesy and decency to tell me: you know what thank you for your offer but I can’t do it. Just threats and recrimination and then a big silent fuck you. Well, I’m not going to dignify these actions with any kind of retaliation (except for venting here). Still, this morning, I was asking why me? Why do people feel comfortable. They definitely shouldn’t. Anyway, I can only keep my side of the street clean…

Today is my friend Matt’s birthday. I wrote Happy Birthday Matt to him in a text. I went to see if he got it, and when I checked, in the box wherein you would type a text to send, were the words: I am not coming home. Isn’t that kind of spooky. I think it is—it flashes me back to the kind of freaky feelings I’d get, always in summer, reading books like The Amityville Horror or Suffer the Children, which I mainly did, in the summer of 76.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree of the Sabian Symbol may be higher than the one listed here  as the symbols culminate in the next degree. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 days.

 

Typos happen—I don’t have time or an intern to edit.*
Copyright 2018 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2018 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Loving Me

Cancer 21° (July 13)

 

Dear Quinn,

First off I wanted to say I think you’re doing great. You reallly are more ahead of the game than you think (despite the obvious setback you wrote about yesterday). Within a short period of days, you will have drafted all of the introductions, and well, really, all of next year’s books, still nearly six months ahead of the game. So good for you for being so staalwart in face of the shifting sands of a schedule. You always pretty much weather life well.

The loss of your parents didn’t really hit you hard. At least you haven’t manifested it as such. I think the loss of other people in your life, however, might be devesating, and you might want to think about that, just as you push yourself to think about your own demise. That was always the beauty of the reading you did in your youth. Starting at quite a young age you read about seers and magi and the like; you read your Vedas and Upanishads and about various pantheons and symbol systems; and that has certainly served in your work as a writer and counselor; and it shall serve you in the course of creating tangible designs, now, as well. You must think of it all holistically and authentically. Just as you have to power to create a powerful herb conconction so do you have the power to create beautiful talismans.

So keep that in mind and know that the busy work is almost over for the year. On the boat you will write your Blague (exploring pas Blagues by reading through, going back to the beginning, marking the dates where certain stories arise, cutting and pasting in those stories, and reworking them a bit, if only smoothing them for storytelling gigs or fully realized performance pieces. That will be an hour of your morning on the boat. And then you will work on smoothing the intros, that will be another hour to two hours of stolen moments—you can likely get through the first six signs in about two days, right? Then you have the whole rest of the time to devote to fleshing out the others. It will be fun and it will keep you focussed. So that by the time you hit New Hampshire, on August 8, you are already editing and drawing out the books, per day, finished on your end, surely, by the 20th—and then you’ll have ten full days of working on your Christmas show while finishing your fundraising. Sounds fairly doable. And, again, I think a simple schedule of work as such will keep you grounded while on holiday without at all interfering with it.

When I first thought to write you this, which was only a few days ago, I was going to see that: “on a deeper note, you’ve gotten really far away from yourself and you need to get it together”; however in just a few short days you have proved you can still rely (albeit decreasingly) on your bounce-back ability. So bravo for continuing to watch your diet and for exercising and getting out and enjoying nature in the process. More than in any summer I can remember, you have gone to the beach more often than I can even count, going back to spring. This is another reason I’m so proud of you. I know it’s painful to fully open like a prismatic, cosmic flower without anesthetizing yourself against the angst and fear, nay panic, in doing so, but it really is better that you operate from this particular station at this point. I don’t often say I love you but I want you to know I really do. You’re a very good person and the irony of being (and no it’s not just your imagination) treated as less-than or discarded by others is not lost on us. You might say it’s proof positive of how powerfully wonderful you can be. So keep up the good work of being yourself! XX

 

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree of the Sabian Symbol may be higher than the one listed here  as the symbols culminate in the next degree. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 days. 

 

Typos happen—I don’t have time or an intern to edit.*
Copyright 2018 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2018 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Would Be Saboteuse

Cancer 20° (July 12)

 

I want to once again fall into the arms of the universe, which for me means letting go of all attachment and moving around the world at will. I feel I have to look on the next ten days before heading off to Alaska as a work-holiday of sorts. I must continue to rest and diet and allow my organs some respite, while I get the entire mechanism of the festival totally up and running. Challenge for the Actor, to be sure. Anyway, I know all is doable if I just do what’s right in front of me and take it from there.

TK dropped out of performing at Afterglow; rather she didn’t sign on, spending months finding excuses not to. I would say to her:

Let us agree that you found excuses and unuttered reasons not to send your contract citing that you had no printer. Still when I asked if you were “for sure signed on” so that I could get posters with your name on it designed and printed you said: “YES.” Despite having patiently waited monthys amid many a number of attmpts to get that plus show information and photos you simply never did. In the process, you kept saying “next week” or “after the show opens” and I tried as best as I could to work around you.

Then suddenly most recently you tried to blame the festival for putting some kind of financial pressure on you, saying you were “broke” and “busted” from doing shows back to back this spring and summer and “don’t you [me] know what you’re asking me [you] to do?” as if I was somehow the cause of what you seem to consider your own financial planning.

All I did, months ago, was offer you a slot in the festival, which you accepted; we settled on a date and you confirmed that both you and TK, your accompanist, could do that date. And I sent you a contract. That was April.

You know as the months ticked by that I need you contract and meterials; you knew I was spending donated money on designing and printing. You kept having me wait and to meanwhile bill the show generically. I suggested wording to you on that score and you told me it was wrong and I changed it. Then suddenly last week you say you’re having second thoughts but that you will “update me after” your show opens. It opened four days ago. I emailed and texted you and you didn’t respond. You try to make this seem like my fault—perhaps I’m seeing your process of your trying to convince yourself, yourself.

I, who have championed you for the last seven years, most notably to ART/Oberon, having you several times at festival and in my series at ART/Oberon, which resulted in a subsequent run of your show and a bucolic workshop. I have built audiences for you in Provincetown and Boston, and this is how you treat me. I may have been gaslighted and ghosted in the past, but not at the same time by the same person; and not by someone whom I trusted to be kind and fair to a friend and colleague.

I will add that I now have to redesign, reprint and redistribute materials with your name on it. And I will refrain from sending you the bill. You will pay without my lifting a finger. I feel bad for you. Anyone who does any combination of Starsky + Cox wrong always gets what they give one-hundred-fold. I apologize in advance for what the universe might deliver.

 

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree of the Sabian Symbol may be higher than the one listed here  as the symbols culminate in the next degree. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 days.

 

Typos happen—I don’t have time or an intern to edit.*
Copyright 2018 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2018 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

New Musings on the Pisces Woman

Cancer 19° (July 11)

Pisces Woman

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree of the Sabian Symbol may be higher than the one listed here  as the symbols culminate in the next degree. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 days.

 

Typos happen—I don’t have time or an intern to edit.*
Copyright 2018 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2018 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

New Musings on the Pisces Man

Cancer 18° (July 10)

Pisces Man

 

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree of the Sabian Symbol may be higher than the one listed here  as the symbols culminate in the next degree. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 days.

 

Typos happen—I don’t have time or an intern to edit.*
Copyright 2018 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2018 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

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