So it turns out Nat’s a Leo. Well that might suggest the showmanship first and the bit of trickery and the need for the spotlight; we’ll have to wait on the misogyny. I’m kidding the Leos. You treat your womenfolk with utmost kindness. And, as we said, it was mostly ego and confidence running this show. All the five? segments were figure-out-able. But, as I said the largely older and wanting to be amazed audience swallowed it hook, line and sinker. But it was really fun and wholesome and Americana. The Leo Man chapter of Sextrology is called the Natural. Nat Leo, Nat Geo, Nat Lawson.
As far removed as one is here in Islesboro, ME, I have to say I feel completely confronted with my self in the best of ways. I think the remoteness is not a detriment, in any shape or form; in fact it just might be the ticket for moving forward. I really must this year write a letter last week December early January to tell people that, moving forward, we need to work six months in advance, now, getting commitments from would-be supporters. This way, if I don’t manage to raise the requisite moneys I will send back what I do raise. Or better yet, I will do the simplest imagineable festival in Provincetown; all on the strictest budget.
Oy, I think I just bummed myself out. The point I’m making is that, in Maine, one needs a coastal view. Maine makes a lot of sense, if you have a coastal view. If you don’t have a coastal view Maine doesn’t make a whole lot of sense excepting the fact that it is artisinal and you get get farm to table everything including pajamas.
Today nothing happened. We could have been anywhere. It was banal. There is a banality inherent in much of this experience. I am not one to talk as I am not the active sort I would have liked to have been. I didn’t come from an outdoorsy family who did things. I think the most beautiful combination about American life is having a lot of money and being really healthy. I still aspire to both. I would be a liar if I said otherwise. I still feel it possible on some level to find that perfect balance of elan, of equipoise.
I love the beaches in Wellfleet and I will be sad to leave them. I said that about leaving Provincetown for Wellfleet but it’s funny how you don’t look back. Somehow, soon enough, what you’ve done newly becomes better than what you did before. There are elements of life that are not entropic. Especially when you’re predisposed to detachment as a human trait. Sometimes detachment stems from a childhood environment of unreliability. When you can’t invest in much of you’re experience you learn to find happiness without certainty. Funny how that works. I have friends who come from very solid, stable backgrounds, both emotionally and financially, and I find they have been iller equipped to handle, yes, monumental and sometimes devestating things like the death of a parent with a sort of shock and awe at the mortality of those from whom they descend. Well guess what…
Typos happen—I don’t have time or an intern to edit.*
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