Capricorn 14° (January 4)

We will almost argue by phone. I have to make my position clear. I think that I do. We already start going back and forth figuring things out. Mine is too vague hers, she admit, went too far. We need to find a middle ground. We absolutely won’t before tomorrow that’s for sure. I will stay in and make a corn and pea risotto. The meeting with the lawyer will come early enough and it is a mad dash in ways to get ready for it. llllllllllllllllll  it does end there. I will feel like a pin cushion and on top of that I really should get tests done and rethink even the concept of medication—I don’t want to be on anything quite frankly. I will resolve this time next year to really make changes in this direction. I’m going to write all afternoon, after a hardy late lunch. But for now I’m going through my notebooks, still and putting them to rest for the year. I wish I could tell you that a year from now you will feel better but I’m afraid that’s not the case. There is clarity, simply, because you will be divorced and money will be split and all that kind of stuff; but once the divorce is final there is nothing anchoring you and the slow drift will begin. Because the fact is you cannot trust that others really do want you in their life; they might be saying so but that just might be another form of control. Anyway, I’m going to make this easy on myself today and just get back into these notebooks: Today was a remarkable day. I don’t want to say good or bad. That sounds like tempting fate. But my wallet was returned. Amazing that none of the friends even write me, some double agents I the end. For me full moon in Pisces is closing a gap in personality. Pisces allows us to dream—a don’t dream it be it sort of thing. The combination of word and picture inexplicably empowering, Feeling “afraid of optimism” In so many ways I didn’t have a chanceI think you know that and yet history was to unfold seemingly all at once after many years of inertia? Don’t know what else to call it I will go ahead and purchase tripod and Halo Lite and all under the heading things to do at night. Look up Mars something people sense for a surplus of things illegible something most likely ahead Sunday Aries and Leo the creation with God so he rested so should you I don’t know if these are horoscopes I was writing at the time or what here is another sentence I don’t want to waste your valuable time but … Oh yeah that was a ditched letter to Meg I believe something I never had to write in the end and then it goes on to say my feeling is that this is going one more go is as good as gold I don’t know what that means either. Right so I got through the 12th there are still tasks on my docket I’ve yet to accomplish and yet as often happens with me I need to remove all obstacles to the single task ahead it worth works both ways the doing of ancillary tasks becomes a warm up exercise in gathering thoughts into sentences which doesn’t always come easy despite years of practice and as the minutiae gets resolved and the closer I get to articulating the main event the knowledge of getting closer builds and the fear gap of not delivery diminishes added to which a I am not and I don’t know what this word is a NGO oh I know I’m not on deadline other than a self-imposed one and B the party to whom I to deliver is so delinquent on deliverables to me. It doesn’t really matter what that all means. It’s meaningful enough without inferences or assignations.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go! Copyright 2022 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.