Aries 15° (April 4)

 

I’m setting the proverbial egg timer. Today there are many marks to hit as I made clear yesterday. I’m not feeling all that swift, a result of falling asleep in a draft, even being in front of the fire, which doesn’t draw all that great here, I think, as I always wake up kind of coldy when I build one and spend the evening staring at the flames. I made a lovely salmon with rutabaga and haricots verts amandine and we actually had dessert for the first time in weeks. I am feeling very confident even though I’m tipping the scales, which I can’t quite understand. I think I said this all before. I actually don’t have much to say (yet) today and the flashback portion of this Blague (I’m reading through five previous Blagues a day dating back to the first year of this thing 2015) yielded practically nada. That’s fine. I’m looking forward to just doing the minimum today, moving things around, really. We bought so much food and there are bits of it that need to be eaten sooner than later, which is fine. It is possible we won’t need to go to the shops for another two weeks now, which mightn’t be a bad thing. Anyway, I will figure that all out. The goal is to clear the decks today, accomplishing some pretty boring work, that I can hopefully do with my brain turned slightly off. Let’s see how that goes. It is very tedious work indeed, but it does need to be done. I don’t know how to celebrate things in this current state of affairs. We had our second book optioned for a TV show and we sold a third book to a more major publisher than our previous two. It feels very good indeed. I am getting closer to having it out with the HC people; and I also have a list of questions for our agent; and I’m curious as to what needs to happen in TV land.

Okay so it wasn’t a monumental day but I did think a great deal about some good stuff. For starters I think I understand how to approach people. Also I think I have created a path for practical creativity, which is a thing. I’m fucking freaked out by what’s happening everywhere. I am blatantly aware of the epic seriousness of the situation. I just ate a half a pound of ground sirloin in the form of two large sliders on g.f. English muffins, topped with a quality bleu cheese and then these carmelized red onions and homemade cherry tomato ketchup I created, paired with a little leftover root vegetable. So the point is if you’re reading this you need to understand that there are over five years of daily Blague entries available to you on this site. It started out in 2015 with me writing about the Sabian Symbols (Google that shite) and then it just became this addiction, really. I am supposed to be being funny but I fear that I very rarely am. But, as I write ever day, even my rare moments are adding up to something, at least that is my hope. You see, I am combing through the last five years (as I write the sixth), reading five Blagues a day, which (you’re such a math wizard), in the course of this years I would have (daily) read all the entries for the first five years. Makes perfect sense if you really stop overthinking. I know it’s something you do, but you can stop now. I know I sound a little manic. This is how I get when I really want to create volume for my Blague. In a way I just get chatty, at the same time I am sending that part of me that wants to entertain and create something of import into overdrive so that what I am typing out now at lightening speed will have at least a shred of validity. Shred has fewer letters in it than I previously thought. I have no written two very chunky paragraphs. And now I have to write at least a middle sized one? Who is making up these rules?

I’ve been in a very 1990s head lately. I think because that was the last time I lived in constant fear of AIDS and all it meant. And now that feeling is back? Is it really thirty years later? How can that be. We stalled in that the generations that came after are not in conflict with us. If anything they wish they were us. I think I’d like to paint over some of the crap I see. I know I don’t have to be so completely cognizant of every last drop of integrity I bring to the table. I can just be me sometimes, whatever that means. Who knows. I like myself in Europe. I understand who I am there. I do not recognize myself very readily in America. It has always been the same old story. In America I live so much in my head—to the point that when I think of myself in Europe I almost have a bias against that guy as if he is unselfaware to a fault or whistling in the graveyard or doing whatever wrong in regard to his understanding of self-existence; and yet that guy who lives there is the guy who goes to yoga every day and takes courses and goes to museums and, like everywhere, shops and cooks and keeps a tidy quarters and entertains (I never entertain here). We need to offer all our clients an extra hour and I need to find out how to pay some shite forward via the community. I think this paragraph might indeed be long enough. I miss some things about Boston, too, now; I look forward to rekindling that relationship. I’m going to suggest A.R.T. postpones our cancellation. Let us do one more full season with a bang. Let’s invite back the biggest selling artists for the last three shows.

The following blocks of texs are exceprts from my first year of  Blagues, nos. 76-80.  I am reading through all my Blagues, five per day, and posting some samples here. Now, in my sixth year of writing this Blague, but the time I get to my seventh, I will have through all the daily Blagues of my first five years. If that’s confusing I apologize:

It’s funny today I was in a quandry about whether to stay at my computer chipping away,writing and producing my myriad self-imposed assignments, all of which I love to undertake—although I would prefer they didn’t happen all in clumps—or get my fast becoming a wee bit too robust self out for some exercise. I am a big believer in staying physically active and I do find that it does indeed transmute into great thought. Some of my best ideas come while sweating my tush off; although it’s always a challenge to remember the thoughts as they arise as one can’t always stop to jot thoughts down while in the middle of certain exercise that requires something of a meditative countenance. And I truly believe that one has to be of a certain physical vitality to fuel ones passions; otherwise they will constitutue a drain, one end of that doubly burning candle. Personally I can only burn one end at a time though I prefer not torching either.

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To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree pointof the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360  degrees spread over 365/6 days per year—so they nearly, but not exactly, correlate.

 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
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