Gemini 6° (May 25)

 

I have to stop doing a number on myself that much is certain. So much of this process is psychological and the so-called delays are imaginary at best. Things are coming to light and I have to tell myself to relax and not worry. Yesterday I made one serious mistake which felt like it was going to take me out; so I’m not going to make that mistake again. There may come a time a few weeks from now, when I might be in a better physical place, that I can try again, but it will have to be done very carefully and with backup just in case things get wiggy. I know I am prone to panic, but it really could be more than that, and I am determined to shift my exercise into higher gear and stay hydrated and to limit intake of anything that alters my consciousness. It is not mixing well with whatever chemicals are released in my brain when I am on a huge (year’s long) project and under a lot of pressure, which I might not be aware of in my usual waking hours. So, I guess what I’m saying is that I learned a valuable lesson and I need to tread lightly with my own constitution, if that makes any sense at all. Not that I really need it to. That said I’m already combatting the suspicion that I’ve squandered my morning, but the proof will be in the pudding on that score as I weave my way through the work at hand. I suppose I want to get a few words in the bank here before I do that because some inspiring thoughts are indeed coming to mind. Though I’m not sure that all of them will make it into the Blague, they may be typed below—I have a line———————that divides thoughts that belong in here and those which do not. I’ve made the mistake in the past of confusing the two and let slip a few names and that sort of thing has come back to bite me. But such is life. I meant to tell S. about Gig Young. Oh well, she should be done with her yoga soon enough. In the meantime I will write this:

Astrology itself is a noble lie, you must be into the notion that the movement of the planets and there relationship one to the other, a snapshot of which, taken at the time of an individual’s, especially, having meaning. Once you accept that concept one enters into a world that functions scientifically, with rules and math and endless associative meaning. Reincarnation, too, is a sort of noble lie that is at the center of major religions and belief systems. It can’t be proven but it is the basis for an entire world of philosophy and codes to live by. Then again, the belief in any God or gods involves the accepting of a noble lie in any case. None of us have ever seen God, that I know of, and yet nothing determines human existence, our morality and judgements and the wars we wage, as does religion. At least we can see the stars.

Our brand of humanistic astrology, you might say, involves the acceptance of both the noble lies of astrology and reincarnation. That is to say that you were born the sign you are (with all the intricacies involved in your individual birth chart) but, for our purposes here, we are focused solely on the placement of the Sun in your chart, which determines what we call your sign. It sounds limiting in that a twelfth, or if we break the signs down again by sex, (not to be confused with gender), a twenty-fourth of the population shares your same sign assignation. But it isn’t, really. For, in our view, there is an inexhaustible wealth of knowledge and self-understanding available from a deep dive into any one astrological estate of sex-sign, the archetypes of which are forever unfolding. But, let’s get back to the double noble lie of astrology and reincarnation being things:  We would take the view that you have reincarnated as a certain sex-sign in this lifetime to learn a whole set of life lessons endemic to the estate of your sex-Sun-sign archetype. For example: Being born an Aries is a life-long lesson in learning a great many things about, for lack of a better term, the Self. Of course, we are all learning about our lower-case selves all the time, but being an Aries is a deep dive into understanding one’s relationship to the upper case Self, that of TK. In this view, astrology, and again the humanistic branch thereof to which we subscribe, is foremost about personal evolution of the individual in this lifetime as it relates to the more esoteric notion of the evolution of an individual’s soul, over many lifetimes. You can certainly enjoy the exercise of exploring the former application, without accepting the latter.

My work process is slower than expected. There was one more grace period present in my schedule that I didn’t even realize was there. We were meant to have a meeting today but honestly I’m just not ready. If my brain is in one thing it is hard for it to suddenly detach and wrap around something else. There is always a dual dynamic. There is the through-line of the main creative project, with its goals and deadlines, that one is pursuing, in which there is a whole universe of hopeful serendipity and inspiration, a beautiful miasma that emerges and into which you can sink in the time/space of that through-line; and then there are all the invading though, creative too, that outline future projects or otherwise take the form of lightbulbs flashing off in your head. So, you try to record those on tiny pieces of paper and putthem aside, hopeful you’ll get to them one day. But your world and your computer folders are filled with these bits and pieces and you think, if I were to get hit by a bus, how could anybody access them in the first place. I need to spend a whole year just printing out hardcopy so that maybe, in my absence, someone could pick up the thread, baton and banner of my creative campaigns. That is all there is. I don’t have children, my ideas are my offspring and I have not always been the best parent. I know that certain circumstance will see my leave the building but I really don’t want to go outside of my experience right now. I’m not sure I need to tangential guilt of the slightest undoing. The myth of Theseus, the pitfalls of “oversight”, as expressed by this great French series I’m watching on the subject, animated and illustrated with the finest works of art. I had always wanted to go to Greece, ever since I was eleven years old; and I finally got there…was it just last summer or was it the summer before? I couldn’t even tell you. I had to just check the calendar. It was only ten months ago. The room is nearly spinning from the realization. I come back to the present. I will make a lovely pasta with red onion, anchovy and parsley for lunch and we will just snack on sweet potatoes with sour cream and chive for dinner. I was back and forth with high school friends today and reached out to one friend I’ve known since 1972, my favorite year and one of pure magic, even, now in my imagination. All the rest will wait. I am beating my head against a wall. And I’m not doing the trick of working for a couple of more hours with the anesthesia of organic red wine. So I’m just going to stop. I’m out of order in today I actually learned more about Orpheus not Theseus, it is he I will alight upon tomorrow.

The following blocks of texs are exceprts from my first year of  Blagues, nos. 321-25  I am reading through all my Blagues, five per day, and posting some samples here. Now, in my sixth year of writing this Blague, but the time I get to my seventh, I will have through all the daily Blagues of my first five years. If that’s confusing I apologize:

And still: There was nothing worth posting from the five older Blagues I read today. It has been really helpful to get an idea of what the content has been over the last five years. The first year was very much about the Sabian Symbols (see below), the bulk of that material I don’t want to post in this slot. And I’m nearly through that year so, once I get into the Blagues from 2016, there will be a lot more to post here (which is a good thing because I won’t have time to write a lot à la minute as we just got a new book deal and that is where my effort and attention is going!

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360  degrees spread over 365/6 days per year—so they nearly, but not exactly, correlate.

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
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