Scorpio 19° (November 11)

 

Look, you do what you can. And I am going to spend the next ten minutes telling you what’s been up today. I still feel icky about the A. thing because, as these things go, there is a chance I’ll be scapegoated. There is something a bit anxious in the air today anyway; and I seem not to be the only one feeling it. Mercury still retrograde like crazy: I went to activate a new card by phone and it wouldn’t let me do that. I went to finish a grant and it asked for certain bits to be uploaded—”demographic material”—which is a bit weird in that they want people’s email addresses and such? It makes no sense. I will piece together this final year while also taking the opportunity to extract myself, professionally and emotionally, from certain influences that are no longer serving. More glitch (and I’m just smart and being preventative) I reached out to the producer at our festival venue to say I wanted to get contracts moving sooner than later this year; and suddenly that was met with “oh can you change the dates I’m not sure they will work” after giving me to greenlight by email which is like more than a verbal agreement, n’est ce pas. The world is filled with the selfish and the cowardly and they seem to be rewarded and remunerated for their narcissistic bullying. But I’m jumping the gun.

I got onto my doctor today to get some preventative health measures in place. I still have one small hurdle to clear tomorrow on that score. Otherwise I spent the day getting a jump on everything to do with next year’s low-hanging grants, and in anticipation for a pow-wow on that score come friday morning. I need to find some easy going folks to be on our board as well to keep that energy moving forward into the new year. In the meantime I have a good deal of press that I can remerchandise. I don’t feel that I need prove myself any more. I mean, at this point I simply want to monetize some of the artful content I’ve created (there’s nothing wrong with saying that, is there?) and get all the ducks in a row. There is so much to do in the next six months it would make anybody else’s head spin. The trick is going to be to get back clear up and clear out because we are not taking all this stuff with us in any case. I am of a mind to want everything brand new; and we will have a moving sale and let people park on rose lane and maybe even out back. I truly want everything that’s not nailed down to be gone daddy gone. It’s definitely time to break with things from the past which isn’t always easy; however, when you’ve lived with them long enough you can let them go. Sometimes this philosophy also applies to people. I have been having an easier time getting my brain around that—a lesson learned from being burned and hurt by others, the mean girls who, even so, are teachers.

If I had to self-psychoanalyze I would admit that, no doubt due to not feeling accepted (read: loved) in my family of origin, I have sought life blood from emotional stones, pretty much all my life. Could explain why all growing up and into adult age my series of bestest friends were all Virgo. There was that PBS series on rocks being the literal platforms for life which was so fascinating. And I think about the mutability of the earth sign of Virgo which we’ve always likened to clay, but it would also apply to those more “core” elements of ore and coal, which becomes diamonds via the sign of Scorpio, yet another link between those two signs. Lends more meaning to Libra balance between the two.  I love working side by side with S. but sometimes she slaps here laptop keys as she types. We were recently visiting her sister who was on her laptop at the dining room table and she does the same thing. Even though they were born before the advent of ubiquitous computers they somehow share some gene that predisposes them to this apparently. I wonder what the primordial equivalent of sitting on a computer would have been that would have been transferred to this functional act. We willl never know.

 

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree pointof the Sabian Symbol will be one degree higher than the one listed for today. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 or 6 days per year—so they near but not exactly correlate.

 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
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