Gemini 1° (May 20)
I will send along that feedback. I will review the to-buy-and-to-do list. I will rejig the reading and writing schedule one more time so to make it manageable. I think the earliest mornings are going to be best for making hay while the sun shines so that I can be out in the world when the non-metaphoric one is actually doing so. Getting that old familiar feeling, even during this awful time, that people are competing for praise and payouts. So not a good luck. If you’re really doing the work to help others you needn’t go around telling everyone how amazing you are for doing what you’re doing. Especially when it’s pretty damned clear that you’re motivated by your bottom line. Anyway I spent the morning putting together the loungers and they are quite big and barely fit but I am keeping them because I want to be able to work outside in a relaxed way. Then off we go to Provincetown to collect mail and all that jazz. It’s becoming too much a thing maybe to keep traveling there although I’m happy to do it on my own. We see that the Farmer’s Market is open which is good news, even as our usual go-to fish and produce stand remains quiet with no signs of life. Speaking of which we didn’t bump into anyone in particular on this journey and it was a quick in and out (so to speak). I had just done one lounger before the trip so I set up the second upon my return. Going to find my way getting into the book project today and try to avoid the whole social media world for a while. A while is a noun, saying awhile is using it as an adverb, modifying a verb, did you know that. I’m all over searches like “growing your own food for beginners” and “how to forage for mushrooms without dying or tripping your dick off.”
So let’s see we ate some leftover chowder and we will make fish tacos for dinner (which will be delicious btw). I am so into cooking and thinking about growing and planning and not shopping. I am definitely “in” to the work now and that is a good thing. I am finding that I have a way through now with certain work and I just want to spend time now reading and thinking about what this next book will be about. I am so grateful for the income of a job that forces me into lockdown at this time in any case. The worst thing about writing a book is feeling like everyone is at recess while you are in detention. Sorry but the whole misery loves company thing is real. Oh and today is day two of our thirty-three day challenge and, on Monday, I will be commencing my day with early morning Bikram yoga, once again. You see, I have to absolutely front load my body now, if for now other reason but I refuse to be a chubby person with long hair. Thin with long hair will be more tolerable. I think I’ll forgo my vanity and even shoot for ye old ponytail until this is over. I know it will never be over. I don’t understand TV news. It used to be that you would get stories from around the world. I remember when Cable first began—how much better that all became because suddenly you were seeing things from very far away, and could tune in around the clock. It expanded our world. And now Cable news does the opposite. They sit and talk about one thing over and over and over and over all the fucking day long. They contribute to the alienation and claustrophobia. I bet you anything there is an herb out there that keeps people from getting too sick from this virus.
Going to make some major moves this week. I’m feeling up to speed and up to snuff. Knock wood. I do not want to get sick with this virus, I can tell you that much. Just going to keep on keeping on. I already brought in a little bit of money and can pay out the three folks who asked after helping me. Look, if it goes no further than that it will have been a success. But it should at least get to the level of ten people, that is the goal. We will figure out the rest as we roll along. There can’t be any loss to the operation. We shall see. No pressure. The other thing that needs happening is putting together our individual profiles and accomplishments and positioning ourselves as the genuine article which we are. We are not phony baloney astrologers, we are true metaphysicians and we are not flash in the pan, mass-produced purveyors of nonsense. I am feeling happy and feeling empowered and I’m going to keep that energy going. I am going to make a delicious soup today. I’m determined to break out that vitamix and make a whole bunch of delicious things. This is the time for this type of thing. To focus on health and well being and creating a little home apothecary of food as medicine and vice versa. This part of my witch craft has always been a thing. I’m going to let that be enough for today, if that’s okay with you. You are so demanding after all. I do realize nobody but me is reading this which is fine by me. This is my therapy. That said starting tomorrow I am going heavily into the astrological theme of this work, at least, for the next twelve days. Call it preparation for a big project coming down the pike. And yes, that was alliteration.
The following blocks of texs are exceprts from my first year of Blagues, nos. 301-305 I am reading through all my Blagues, five per day, and posting some samples here. Now, in my sixth year of writing this Blague, but the time I get to my seventh, I will have through all the daily Blagues of my first five years. If that’s confusing I apologize:
Having to assume such responsibility so young does strain one’s natural capabilities. It also robs one of a childhood. Role reversal with a parent is not a comfortable thing. It can cause a pattern of “accelerated growth”; lightbulb going off: Perhaps this is why I acted out in so many “adult ways” in any case around that time. If one has a parent who is so checked out; and one spends a great deal on one’s own as a child; it follows that this child might get him or her self into some pretty adult situations, even when their normal means of transportation is a red Columbia no-speed bike with a foot brake. Oh the places you will go when you have no parental support but the opposite—how you might get back at your parents and the world by getting yourself into some sophisticated, even sordid situations. Not to say that there aren’t certain advantages to have lived during a certain time, and under a certain roof, in childhood where I didn’t really have one (a childhood that is). And I know it contributes to my disdain for helicopter parents nowadays who create little Sidharthas out their kids; still, I suppose I could have stayed a child a wee bit longer than I did.
But it was the 1970s and the Disney child hero, who was already bucking the parental system by being “mischievous” sneaking out at night to solve a crime at the old so-and-so’s derelict house down the street was morphing into underage partygoers hiding their glasses of champagne for photos taken at Studio 54. To be a fast pre/teen, in every sense of that word, seemed to be rewarded by the media. To be a kid was kid stuff. Who knew that my generation would grow up to become somewhat infantilized, wistful for a childhood they never had? I haven’t succombed to that fate as readily as many of my peers who have dressed like Dennis the Menace well into their 40s. For me living fast while young was a symptom of identifying with the bright young things of the 1920s, a time when you were already married with kids by the time you hit the age of 25.
To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°, for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360 degrees spread over 365/6 days per year—so they nearly, but not exactly, correlate.
Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
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