Libra 12° (October 4)

Day Fifty-Two E.D.A.N.O.W.W. I decide to go full steam ahead with the emancipation gathering and commemorate the most difficult (summer)time of my life. I’m feeling so positive after setting date to sign the lease and start moving things over to the space I’m renting on route to buying. I am living in a fool’s paradise. I should know I’m dealing with someone who is more than eccentric. Anyway I will make a list of everyone and invite about sixty people. Then I will go to dinner tonight at Winslows and put a bug in their ear. I not only realize the crew there are the same folks that I had big conversation about astrology with months ago; but some of them are also part of the crew I hung with years ago pre-pandemic at Oysterfest. It was rather eye-opening that this is the same core folk. They are sort of scary children of the corn. I know I am writing these tiny paragraphs knowing I’ll will add to them as time goes on. I have to switch plans in the coming days. I know where I’m going with this but that’s because I haven’t written in days. I have been thrown away like a piece of garbage. It really is unbelievable after all this time together. I will write the couple closest and say how difficult it has been to love them sometimes, given their treatment of me over the decades; and also of us in recent years. I remember when N. got her surgery how they catastrophized it. When S. had the same surgery years before and nobody blinked an eye. It was always upsetting to me how little they prioritized the best person in that family and just gave attention to those who would pay the bills. They are all really money obsessed in the end. But the thing about raising a child who had a bedroom that wasn’t slept in for twelve years. That’s effed up. It always has been effed up. And whenever we revealed the fact people would audibly gasp. But all is secrets. And yet I’m the fucked up one. I’m not the fucked up one. I have been super honest about myself since teen age to my loved ones. It was fine until it wasn’t. It was cool until it was inconvenient. I had to go underground and when is forced to repress it comes out, later, in ways that aren’t exactly correct for the person. I tried things once. I didn’t always like them. And some things were not to be repeated. But some things were like what the ef. Just try it on for size. Nothing ever has to fit for long. Just because a human experiments, in his or her spare time doesn’t mean that is who they are. If I want to give something a whirl once it doesn’t mean I am deep into it. And besides, who would have thunk one was being spied on the whole time. I used to get shit in our youth for opening someone’s diary and reading a page. But it’s okay to hack into their emails and take everything out of context not realizing that most thing that happens in that arena are total bullshit. That the whole point is that it is virtual and not real and you are hiding behind a screen. That that said, it can become more than a distraction and isn’t really all that good for the soul. I have been thinking of late that I’d like to return to who I was in the late eighties, reading the Upanishads and Vedas and focusing on my Chakras. Hope it’s not too late. I haven’t been very good to my body that much is true.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go! Copyright 2021 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved. Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2021 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox.