Sagittarius 22° (December 14)

Seems weird to eat Salmon leftovers so many days later but that’s what the menu said I did. This day is all about preparing for tomorrow morning and really nothing else can be accomplished but that. I am still writing from the future and mining the past. Today’s rerun from July 22 and it’s the first time I see any reference made at all and it is a hidden one so what’s the big deal:

Today will have to be different. I’m going to do a deep bedroom clean. Oysters then Spinach and Lobster Mashed to go. It’s Thursday so it must be Rachel. If I didn’t have this pricey cafeteria, I don’t know what I’d do. It lifts my spirits to the max. I need to start paying myself back for the extravagance though I can’t be dropping coin on pricey food every night. It will right itself; meanwhile I am totally doing what my soul wants and that is all I can do. It isn’t quite getting easier though I have to say. S. has asked me not to write her but it is all I do. I have to get my truth out there regardless of the consequences. It is a definite must. Thanks to Brad and to CB and Caroline and thanks to Roderick and DC and all the people who have been rallying around one way or the other. I just need to knock myself out tonight really and I will do exactly that. She can have whatever she wants. She can carry the purse. I don’t have to do it anymore, but if she is taking even more handouts then that will be on her. I wrote the business plan while she was in school. I found, through my contacts, the people who now work with us. I was way instrumental in the creation of all the pieces, pendants especially. I wrote half a book while nothing really moved along on the other side. Lots of time doing yoga and pilates and talking with best girl friends and taking pictures and videos of oneself in various outfits for not only our shared media but ones own. Narcissism has been rampant culminating in the story brought home from New York about how irriestible one is. Penny had great insight into that one. She’s seventy and says it still happens to her. She is also a bisexual who says that she would jump into the sack with another woman in an instant but she has never had an emotional connection to someone of the same sex. Word. Women get away with it. I never have. And in the end the heteronormative narrative will out. It dovetails with all the familiar turf—and yes that word was chosen carelly. . I warned a certain friend not to go down that road but she did anyway, alienating, okay, maybe not the masses, but the quality sensitive children of the world, not to mention all the actors that ever portrayed her characters. But “it is the hill” she wishes to die on. Would you, please? I get J + LLB now more than ever. The hostage taking the holding forth. Don’t get me wrong I truly love my sister with whom I’ve always felt I shared a brain, but the hubris is rampant and delusions of grandeur will out. Emphasis on will. I’m bitter because I’m not an idiot and I know what’s been going on. There is only one way that this can happen the way it is, let us say, in a level of comfortability. If you’re reading this it’s fine. I feel a bit put off by all of this. It isn’t happening to you personally and you’re taking sides and that isn’t good or kind or any of the things you might consider yourself. I feel good about myself, meanwhile; and I have always been exactly who I am so don’t expect any more apologies from me. If you don’t want a person like me around then I not only don’t want to be around you but, meanwhile, what were you thinking the last thirty-nine years, exactly? I am learning that I have a lot of friends out there who love me and more on that tomorrow.

Today will have to be different. I’m going to do a deep bedroom clean. Oysters then Spinach and Lobster Mashed to go. It’s Thursday so it must be Rachel. If I didn’t have this pricey cafeteria, I don’t know what I’d do. It lifts my spirits to the max. I need to start paying myself back for the extravagance though I can’t be dropping coin on pricey food every night. It will right itself; meanwhile I am totally doing what my soul wants and that is all I can do. It isn’t quite getting easier though I have to say. S. has asked me not to write her but it is all I do. I have to get my truth out there regardless of the consequences. It is a definite must. Thanks to Brad and to CB and Caroline and thanks to Roderick and DC and all the people who have been rallying around one way or the other. I just need to knock myself out tonight really and I will do exactly that. She can have whatever she wants. She can carry the purse. I don’t have to do it anymore, but if she is taking even more handouts then that will be on her. I wrote the business plan while she was in school. I found, through my contacts, the people who now work with us. I was way instrumental in the creation of all the pieces, pendants especially. I wrote half a book while nothing really moved along on the other side. Lots of time doing yoga and pilates and talking with best girl friends and taking pictures and videos of oneself in various outfits for not only our shared media but ones own. Narcissism has been rampant culminating in the story brought home from New York about how irriestible one is. Penny had great insight into that one. She’s seventy and says it still happens to her. She is also a bisexual who says that she would jump into the sack with another woman in an instant but she has never had an emotional connection to someone of the same sex. Word. Women get away with it. I never have. And in the end the heteronormative narrative will out. It dovetails with all the familiar turf—and yes that word was chosen carelly. . I warned a certain friend not to go down that road but she did anyway, alienating, okay, maybe not the masses, but the quality sensitive children of the world, not to mention all the actors that ever portrayed her characters. But “it is the hill” she wishes to die on. Would you, please? I get J + LLB now more than ever. The hostage taking the holding forth. Don’t get me wrong I truly love my sister with whom I’ve always felt I shared a brain, but the hubris is rampant and delusions of grandeur will out. Emphasis on will. I’m bitter because I’m not an idiot and I know what’s been going on. There is only one way that this can happen the way it is, let us say, in a level of comfortability. If you’re reading this it’s fine. I feel a bit put off by all of this. It isn’t happening to you personally and you’re taking sides and that isn’t good or kind or any of the things you might consider yourself. I feel good about myself, meanwhile; and I have always been exactly who I am so don’t expect any more apologies from me. If you don’t want a person like me around then I not only don’t want to be around you but, meanwhile, what were you thinking the last thirty-nine years, exactly? I am learning that I have a lot of friends out there who love me and more on that tomorrow.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go! Copyright 2021 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved. Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2021 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox.

Sagittarius 21° (December 13)

Right so this is the night I attend trivia at the Provincetown Brewery where I get to Bob K. and talk about his show which is great. We do okay as team squid but it is quite boring, as is the company. I do get to see Mark A. which is nice. We walk back to Commercial and I’m still starving after the awful nachos—so I pretend I’m going home but slip into the Pig and have a nice bowl of smokey fish chowder which surely hits the spot. What I won’t realize for a very long time is just how fleeting the time in Ptown will be, and it will be the same too for the time I end up spending in Truro as well. I am writing this now from late summer next year. Yes this is me catching up on months and months and months of letting this Blague go. Because in a very short amount of time…maybe by April or before I will receive a very mean note from a very specific person claiming that I’ve written stuff about her. So I am now in the future posting here about the past, going through all my entries from June 30 of this year on: I see that it isn’t until July 16 that I write anything personal. Here is a rerun:

So yesterday was one of the most traumatic days of my life and yet I did end up connecting with the b-i-l and it was good to be able to have a human here while I went through all my emotions. Let me back up. This Blague was never really meant to be a forum for personal life and all that involves. But, over the years, there were times where it took on a personal feel. But it was never confessional and certainly not on the level of exposition in the extreme ever before. I thought this would be the worst day (I will be very shortly very wrong). I decided fuck this I’m going to Uber to dinner and back again. I went to Mac’s Shack and despite the throngs was seated immediately at the sushi bar—the first perk of being single. I ordered a pint of house Krolsch and a dozen oysters. I then did the exact thing again, one of my second dozen going to my neighbor whose name was Jo, there with her pretty daughter whose name escapes me. I then had chowder. I then had sushi—crabby crunch roll, mackerel nigiri, and a spicy tuna handroll and more beer. I was suddenly exhausted explaining to Jo and daughter the laste few events of my life. I was shocked that young waitstaff kept coming up to me because apparently they remember we/us from when they were teenagers working here. You could see the question in their eyes: Why are you here alone? Is she dead? Sorry but that’s what I saw in their eyes. I was going to use the company card to pay as a fuck you but I didn’t do that in the end. Ubers by the way are super expensive when you take them on the outer Cape. Holy Ef. And meanwhile they are nearly impossible to book. Good thing I won’t do this again for a very long time I thought. And yet two days later I will repeat this but on a budget plan. I wrote large scribbles into a notebook that I would love to read and type back; but that would be impossible at this point. It felt amazing to be out and seen and to converse. I am reminded that I’m the personality who outreaches to folks in the world. I am flooded with the fact that she is going to fuck me over every which way. The way this happened to my mind (not hers) is ridiculous. To my mind also cruel in the sense that she led me to believe every night we sat outside having wine and nibblies and dinners—one of the ways, like cleaning, I show love–to allow me to do all this on the night she knows she’s leaving? Holy merde. She will say it was the only way she could do it. She did say that; and I totally believe her. But I heard her planning this months ago on Facetime with her friend Noelle in Canada. I was at the dryer folding laundry, separated basically by thin paneling while she’s under earbuds not realizing she’s nearly shouting. I calmly addressed her when she got off her call and was ready for wine and nibblies. I said just so you know I heard you saying that once the book was finished in six months or so you’re going to leave. I also heard you say that you need to be with someone who desires you in the way you need to be desired. I told you I heard you. And you gaslit me. You said I misheard and immediately deflected saying you were responding to the fact Noelle was saying that Joe had sexual issues of a sort.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go! Copyright 2021 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved. Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2021 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox.

Sagittarius 20° (December 11-12)

This is the aftermath of when the Barclays stuff goes down. So not fun. Leading up to what will be a difficult week with the four way. Everything always such a mad rush I can’t stand that dynamic. I will go to Ciro and Sal’s on Sunday and I believe they overcharge me. I will call them on Monday but get no satisfaction whatever. Oh well what can you do.

are renowned authors, astrologers, metaphysicians, and cultural arbiters. They are consultants and coaches to fashion, art and entertainment industry leaders on an international scale. Stella and Quinn received their training at the London Faculty of Astrological Studies. Quinn is widely recognized for his credible psychic and intuitiveabilities. Stella holds a Master of Science degree in Applied Positive Psychology from the University of East London; she is also a certified meditation guide.

Starsky + Cox reinvented the genre of astrology with their groundbreaking, best-selling book Sextrology(HarperCollins) which has sold upwards of a half a million copies worldwide. Referred to as “the red bible” and translated into fifteen foreign editions, Sextrology launched at fashion bastions around the globe including Barneys in New York and Los Angeles, Colette in Paris, Selfridges in London and Harvey Nichols in Dublin and Edinburgh. Themany outspoken fans of Sextrology include: Charlize Theron, Russell Brand, Parker Posey, Megan Fox, Isaac Mizrahi, Kelly Ripa, Rufus Wainwright, Sharon Stone, Cameron Diaz, Marc Jacobs, Scarlett Johansson, Kate Moss, Tori Amos, and JK Rowling. Sextrology was followed by Cosmic Coupling (Random House)and Starsky + Cox’s popular Haute Astrology yearly horoscope series. A new book is in the works.

Starsky + Cox have partnered with and created content for Marc Jacobs, MAC Cosmetics, Sephora, Neiman Marcus, Chandelier Creative, Bryan Rafanelli and Kylie Minogue, among others. Additionally, Starsky + Cox have contributed to publications and sites worldwide, including Vogue Paris, Allure, Cosmopolitan,Vanity Fair, The Daily Beast, Elle and Glamour. They have been regular guests on “Chelsea Lately” and innumerable other TV and radio programs. Starsky + Cox regularly present their Cosmic Clinic™, offering on-the-spot astrological readings at corporate, private and charity functions. The couple present lectures and workshops on their unique philosophy of the cosmos; and, on a lighter note, they perform original, live musical and metaphysical comedy shows at venues like Joe’s Pub at the Public Theater in New York City and at Oberon Club at the American Repertory Theater in Cambridge, Massachusetts. In 2020, Starsky + Cox are set to launch their lauded, once and future AsterCast fine jewelry collection.

“Psychics to the stars.” —Vanity Fair

“The favored astrologers of fashion insiders.”—Elle “A word-of-mouth phenomenon…a rare find”—Time

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go! Copyright 2021 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved. Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2021 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox.

Sagittarius 18° (December 10)

A sweaty night’s sleep. Was thinking of Bonnie Sip last night as I was cooking dinner and suddenly she beamed in. Weirdly she had also made a sort of taco meal the night before and had gone to the dentist in the day as I did. And she’s obsessed with her water pic which I have to buy today if I can. I’ll call Snows. I have a lot on my plate today so I thought I would start just by telling myself what to do. It is now 11:20 and I should leave here no later than noon and stop by the bank to make a quick small deposit. Then I will drive to Wellfleet PO and deal with the box and the forwarding. That should take me to 1PM and hopefully enough time to get to Hyannis. Actually I should try and get out of here soon and deal with the scratches on the car. What a hassle. On the way back from Hyannis I will stop and get the little bit more of groceries I need. I can plan menus today while waiting for the car or I can work on starting to put together what will be needed for the four-way. I also need to call some restos and see if they need help. Meanwhile I will write to Len and say a simplified version of what I said yesterday. One: modest but I have a bunch of little lamps and some art and throw pillows and cookbooks and baskets and other decorative items to warm it up. Would you be open to my repainting some of the walls that are already painted not paneled (a color you approve). The TV there comes with? Is wifi and internet hooked up and/or included or would that be up to me. If it works for him I would like to pay the full $7K sooner than later. Also, as I have to be out of here April 30, could I start moving things over (and maybe doing some painting) during the last week or ten days in April. Ideally Richard will have been happy with me as tenant and will have me back next November and if you are likewise happy I could return to your cottage for a second year. I am trying to foster as much domestic stability as I can create for myself at this point in my life which is otherwise so uncertain. As much as one yearround place would be appealing, I kind of like the idea of being in Truro in the summer as Ptown can be so hectic. 

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go! Copyright 2021 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved. Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2021 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox.

Sagittarius 17° (December 9)

Was coughing terribly in the night and would have had a rather legit reason to reschedule the dentist, but I went through with it, after post offices and banking and ended the day with a big shop at Friends. Got some wine in for the next couple weeks. That is to say four bottles. I need to lose some lbs. and keep an eye on health. Went to dentist which went well. Added a puree of homemade roasted red pepper to the meat mix and toasted pinenuts and served it inside acorn squash. So, so good. I will be working at night a lot it looks like. I do think it’s the answer to not crying all fucking evening. I have to write something up for Len. What I think I want to say is I think the place is modest yes but with some cosmetic touches could be a really cool pad. My main objective is to secure a situation for a year or more out. That is to say that ideally I would move from here at Richard’s to Truro and then repeat that again at least another year if everyone was happy. I think I have to end with that. So first say how cool it can be and would it be possible to start moving things over last week in April as I brought many books and cookbooks and my own spices and utensils and throw pillows and paintings and fun canisters and baskets for the kitchen and my own toaster and little lamps and blankets and all that sort of thing such to make this place mine. Would be great to casually move things over. Also would he be open to my painting walls (obviously only ones that are already painted—not painting over wood or anything–agreed upon colors etc. I’d actually like to pay for the season as soon as possible because the less money in my account the better during the divorce process. Ideally would rent a at least two years in a row if we were happy with the arrangement. And would pay next fall again for following summer. Also ideally Richard will be happy with me as tenant and I can repeat his/your place again in rotation. If we decide to do two summers in a row, and, say, Richard doesn’t rent to me again and I decide to travel or what have you in winter, would it be possible to leave items of mine in the house over the winter. That sort of thing. More mining the past for PR ideas:

Provincetown friends, Starsky + Cox were there at the inception of Tim-Scapes, encouraging Convery to realize his signature vision. Collaboration, a decade-long point of discussion, was just a matter of time. And, softly this past summer, the Starsky + Cox x Tim-Scapes partnership was launched, first, with a line of twelve cotton unisex Zodiac tees, in five sizes, the fronts of which portray a team-effort, still trademark Tim-Scapes distillation of the signs’names, cream on black, graphically punctuated by pictorial elements native to their symbology; and, on the backs, evocative key words, in shiny black type, that wearably “spell” Starsky + Cox’s own endowment of cosmic empowerment. And, in true Tim-Scapes fashion, Provincetown is populated with folks ubiquitously sporting what the trio have christened the Astro-Scapes tees.

Available exclusively at the Tim-Scapes store, 208 Commercial Street, Provincetown, or fromthe company’s online shop at TIM-SCAPES.COM, the tees are just the beginning of what is designed to be an ongoing Starsky + Cox x Tim-Scapes collaboration with additional apparel andaccessories, as well as jewelry and home design products also in the stars.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go! Copyright 2021 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved. Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2021 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox.

Sagittarius 16° (December 8)

Only semi-productive day, really. Need to really get things back on track. I am determined that the eating out is over. I have to start getting up at dawn and/or working in the evenings. I think the only thing that is going to fight the blues is the creation of content and so I will do just that. I will make myself this sort of organic beef taco in corn tortillas for dinner. Delicious. I will do the consultancy. I will put myself back out there as a celebrity feature writer journalist. I will have websites that will help me put those pieces together. I will try to raise some dough for the Tim collaboration. (These were all thoughts I had on this date, which over time have been dashed by the ridiculous process that has come to be known as this separation and divorce. I am definitely going to suffer more than I realize at this time, late in the autumn. I will never have anywhere near the amount of money I should have for starters. I will learn that I have lost pretty much all the friends I care about, all at once, as in the case of J+N and ST and others, and slowly, over the course of time, as proximity to our best friends abroad will not be something I am going to have. Anyway I’m reaching back into the archives for some old press releases as we try to get the jewelry collaboration up and running: October 28, 2019 Provincetown, MA: “The duo behind Sextrology, a wildly popular astrology tome whose straight-forward attitude has been embracedby the chic set” (Vogue): Celestial word- smiths and creatives Stella Starsky and Quinn Cox have collaborated on a line of flagship astrological themed tee shirts with artist Tim Convery, whose bold, graphic Tim-Scapesprints and products, rendered in his original “Duct Tape” typeface, have made an indelible imprint on the design landscape. From his Provincetown Tim-Scapes store, established in 2012, Convery first effectively re-branded thetown, its millions of visitors (and residents too) swathing themselves in his intrepid pictorial designs that incorporate his unique distillation of the PTOWN moniker, plastered on everything from tees to hoodies, totes to mugs, key chains to bumper stickers. Since its inception Tim-Scapes has gone on to capture other towns and cities, mainly in artistic prints, a nod to vintage travel posters, and to publish books and create logos for charitableorganizations to which Tim-Scapes donates a portion of sales from their related designs.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go! Copyright 2021 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved. Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2021 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox.

Sagittarius 15° (December 7)

Turkey cheese roll up and that’s it. Met with one of the board members of Provincetown Theater, was productive. Did spend the morning corresponding with Dom and Nan. I sit here trying to write something meaningful or inspiring. Or to at least use the space for the productive purpose of a launching pad for things I need to write anyway, but I just end up trying to deconstruct my feelings on this date from a distant point in the future. One would think I would feel worlds better by now but really nothing has changed emotionally in the in between times, except that maybe, just maybe I am less in shock than I was on this day. I think I spent a great length of time in shock. And probably, looking back on where I am now from a further date in the future I will also see that I still am. And there is nothing for it. There is nothing I can say or do. I am still falling asleep with Friends playing on a loop, just so that I have familiar voices around me. I am definitely more angry now and feeling justified in certain things. I was blamed for being angry much of the time but so much of my anger was due to the fact that there was inequality in the shared work/domestic space and what I will come to learn is that it doesn’t change. If anything it is far worse than I ever imagined. At least now there are witnesses. I tend to power through my to-do list and I always accomplished a great many things in a given day, all of which were bent on further shared success. I had grown increasingly resentful that for others the day consisted mainly of variations on a spa treatment theme. Also it becomes clearer and clearer that this was all worked out very carefully in advance over the course of many months, perhaps even a year or more. The whole “the crime must fit the punishment” routine. And though I might be incredibly volatile and times and terrible and tempering my emotions, I have never been a cold a calculated character. It just isn’t me. All that calculation went way back I now realize, as in the course of the unfolding of financial facts I will learn that not only did one abscond with shared life savings, but one was using it for personal purposes the entire time. I was always completely trusting when it came to money and never once in a million years would imagine someone dipping in and out of said savings. Because it is surely something I would never myself do. Also no matter what the circumstance I would have never in a million years destroyed life-long friendships with people that have meant so much. I seem to be blamed for doing so myself but I really cannot accept that. Again, I would have never imagined how cool and calculating a person could be. I don’t have it in my to ruin someone else, especially if I knew that someone else was otherwise quite alone in the world. Don’t get me wrong: I was an asshole in oh-so many ways, and I did and said things I will regret for the rest of my life. But it really does take two to tango and instead of hashing it all out, I was given an increasing amount of rope with which to be hanged. At least this day will end without my feeling totally crazy and getting some support for the less than few and distant friends I have that, yeah, it’s all pretty fucked up really. It will take me so, so long to live things down; and I will have to reinvent myself utterly to survive. It’s a go big or go home (to my maker) type of situation. On top of which all I will do is worry about money.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go! Copyright 2021 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved. Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2021 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox.

Sagittarius 14° (December 6)

I will go to trivia tonight which is pretty horrible to be honest. And then to the Pig for oysters and fish and chips. The eating out really does have to stop, and it will. Texted Dom and Nan and will hopefully speak to them tomorrow. I will come to learn that I am addicted to worry on many levels. Especially surrounding my living conditions. This Blague is still so much about personal things. People may find it not the right forum for what I’m going through. Of course, it started as something completely other but it is my only consolation. It apparently also gets me in trouble I will come to learn. Though I always disguise names, apparently I didn’t account for the ridiculously rich and powerful and their need to scour my existence for reasons to reject me. It will all be fine in the end. This is the fire I am going through. Today is also a very anonymous day birthday-wise—I thought yesterday was bad. Today we have Dave Brubeck and Tom Hulce and these are not exactly household names for the most part. I never knew Sagittarius to be so obscure. If anything, one would think that every day would be packed with famous folk. Too clever by half is surely one way to describe me and really what has gotten me into the most trouble in my life. I can tell you (meaning me) from a future point of view that you are still very much in the crucible and you will remain in it for such a quite a long time. I will also start listening to a lot of rap? What am I calling it? Someone like Jack will still, almost a year later than this date, be doing “word sculptures”; you mean letters found at the side of the road by assistants and thrown onto a wall. We didn’t need it ten years ago. We didn’t even need it twenty years ago or ever, but there it is. “0h my god what happened to Vernon” such great music out there. I don’t expect anyone to get that reference. This, what I call, aloneliness, is really hard at this point in life. As time goes on I will be haunted by how much I invested in the “we” of existence while I should have been more selfish and focused on the “I”; a stupid Libra man thing to do. Taking that “we are” motto of the sign too far as I have and getting screwed over because of it, or in the reverse case of other Libra men, the opposite: putting himself in a place where if he leaves she’s fucked. Anyway, in about three minutes I’m going to try and type up a bunch of thoughts for this Blague at five minute intervals just for the bleeding fun of it.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go! Copyright 2021 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved. Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2021 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox.

Sagittarius 13° (December 5)

Tofu, Greens, Scallion, Ginger for lunch. Octopus tonight for dinner. Revisiting this post that’s all that’s written here so far. I will have lost so many important friends on top of the most important friend in my life. I can’t fathom how I’ve done anything to warrant this. It truly does take two to tango and I don’t think that it’s been fairly documented this whole time. I need to get a handle on how much Blague needs catching up on. That’s sort of my only goal for today. I finally did just that but it was a long time coming. So much has transpired since last “we” spoke. The ringer is something through which I’m still being put. I don’t know what to do with all the “information” I’m receiving, so much conflict involved. Today is a funny birthday as there are some major characters, but very few. Some days have a ton of famous people, this one not so much. There is Walt Disney and Little Richard and General Custer, and Otto Preminger the rest are relatively unknown and the only famous woman I know born this day is Margaret Cho. The feeling I get is that it’s one of lightning striking or not. Both Sagittarius and Gemini, being axis signs, share the concept of electricity, Gemini being the mutable-air sign of static electricity and the mutable-fire sign of Sag being the extreme giant spark of lightning. Unpredictable to say the least. The energy of this day is very all or nothing it would seem. I want so much (writing from the future) to understand my mindset in the past. I don’t feel I will have progressed that much, to use the future anterior I suppose. I think I understand from where I sit that I had to wallow. At the same time I am blissfully unaware of the pain that is to come. So much more heartache in store it’s not real. I will get to a point emotionally where I am forced to rally my individual forces and also count my friends and allies one by one. But at this very point in time I understand I’m still in shock. In some ways I’m still wishing that repair is possible. It will turn out to be a pipe dream. I need to learn to make my own money and lots of it. I have to be clearheaded for this I (will) realize. It is all going to be slow going. And the simplest things exhaust me. That will end up being okay. It will be fine and dandy to just do one tiny thing a day until such time as I am emotionally and mentally back up and running. Baby steps for sure. I flash to that scene in the only good first SATC film where Samantha is spoonfeeding Carrie. I hope some day soon to have someone to spoonfeed me but en route to that I will have to learn how to do it for myself. I spent pretty much three decades going without certain intimacy and I didn’t understand how unloved I felt. I was in a unique position to supplement these feelings but, as is so often the theme or recurring pattern of my life, the symptom became the cause and the crime was made to fit the punishment. As time goes on I will discover just how thrown under the bus I’ve really been. Until then I keep trying like some kind of puppy dog to get some scrap of affection from someone whom I always perceived as truly loving. My dreams are all of disbelief. I get flashes where I have to do everything all at once. Especially if I’ve altered my consciousness in any way. But the truth is that I must sink deeper into the grief. I won’t learn that for a very long time.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go! Copyright 2021 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved. Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2021 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox.

Sagittarius 12° (December 4)

Stayed in bed most of the day. Was in a definite fog. Ate some gummies and tried to let it all go. Wrote some tearful emails but I have to put an end to that leg of the journey now. This has got to be an empowering time for me. It seems my lot in life to be sacrificed from epoch to epoch. I realize it is part of a pattern, this most recent dumping being the most poignant and devastating of my entire existence. There is in some weird way a certain peace in it. Or rather, I feel, a kind of purification by fire. I know I am not the easiest person in the world. I’m complicated and have done some careless things. I can be as verbally cutting as my fierce Apollo archetype, that razor sharp orator and oracular god of light who nonetheless casts a long, dark python shadow. I am bubbling up an idea, which I will need time to put into works. I have to get through this first half of a book before I can start the new project, but intend to start it I do. I will need to make everything crystal clear and avoid any kind of lying. I will also need to say up front that nobody is the villain and nobody is the victim. I can divine a structure. I will likely need to find somebody else to sell it—who knows. My instincts were right to stay solo this weekend and not do much in the way of socializing. I need my feelings to continue to surface as painful as this process is. I need the purification of the fire. I need to start getting to a place where I make a solid plan. I think I did the right thing(s) so far. I just need to keep going.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree point of the Sabian Symbol may at times be one degree higher than the one listed here. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. 

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go! Copyright 2021 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved. Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2021 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox.